There are a few important things to know about fetishes:
Fetishes are the association of some sense image, or some object with
sexual pleasure or gratification. They exist on a spectrum. Some
people find certain objects titillating. Some find them very important
to their sex lives. Some are unable to achieve sexual satisfaction
without the objects of their fetishes.
- There are more different fetishes than you could imagine.
- Many, many people have them.
- There is nothing wrong with them.
- If you don't have a particular fetish, you may just not get it.
- Not getting it, doesn't mean that you can't share the passion of
someone who does.
All manner of things can be the target of fetishes, and fetishes can
be triggered by any of the senses. For example, getting sexual
pleasure from high heeled shoes is very common for both men and
women. As far as the senses go, some people fetishize particular
body odors (smell), the rustling sound of taffeta (sound), certain
foods or bodily secretions (taste), the sight of all manner of objects
or body parts (vision), and the feel of materials such as leather, latex
Fetishistic feelings and behaviors are often expressed in concert with
other behaviors such as:
Although there is nothing wrong with fetishistic feelings or
behaviors, fetishes often cause individuals to seek therapy either because
they are embarrassed or fear difficulties in forming relationships with
partners who may not understand. Couples often seek therapy because
of feelings of alienation ("He loves the heels, not me"), guilt, or
betrayal/dishonesty ("She's been hiding this from me for fifteen
- Cross-dressing (see here for a more
detailed discussion of fetishistic
- Bondage and domination (B&D), and humiliation,
- Sadism and masochism (S&M).
I have been treating people with fetishes for many, many years, and
you can be sure that I will not be surprised or judgemental.
More details are available on my curriculum
vitae. Please don't hesitate to contact