There are a few important things to know about fetishes:
  • There are more different fetishes than you could imagine.
  • Many, many people have them.
  • There is nothing wrong with them.
  • If you don't have a particular fetish, you may just not get it.
  • Not getting it, doesn't mean that you can't share the passion of someone who does.
Fetishes are the association of some sense image, or some object with sexual pleasure or gratification. They exist on a spectrum. Some people find certain objects titillating. Some find them very important to their sex lives. Some are unable to achieve sexual satisfaction without the objects of their fetishes.

All manner of things can be the target of fetishes, and fetishes can be triggered by any of the senses. For example, getting sexual pleasure from high heeled shoes is very common for both men and women. As far as the senses go, some people fetishize particular body odors (smell), the rustling sound of taffeta (sound), certain foods or bodily secretions (taste), the sight of all manner of objects or body parts (vision), and the feel of materials such as leather, latex or satin.

Fetishistic feelings and behaviors are often expressed in concert with other behaviors such as:

  • Rôle-playing,
  • Cross-dressing (see here for a more detailed discussion of fetishistic crossdressing),
  • Bondage and domination (B&D), and humiliation,
  • Sadism and masochism (S&M).
Although there is nothing wrong with fetishistic feelings or behaviors, fetishes often cause individuals to seek therapy either because they are embarrassed or fear difficulties in forming relationships with partners who may not understand. Couples often seek therapy because of feelings of alienation ("He loves the heels, not me"), guilt, or betrayal/dishonesty ("She's been hiding this from me for fifteen years").

I have been treating people with fetishes for many, many years, and you can be sure that I will not be surprised or judgemental.

More details are available on my curriculum vitae. Please don't hesitate to contact me.